The Best Retreat Venues To Survive a Zombie Apocalypse in 2022
Where would your yoga retreat clients want to fight off a zombie invasion?
Imagine you had to go into another long term lockdown, but instead of hiding from a virus you are fleeing mobs of man eating zombies. And this worldwide life ending event just so happened while you were on a relaxing yoga or wellness retreat…Where would be the safest location? What would be the best retreat venue to stand your ground and save mankind?
What would be the ideal place to hunker down, seek refuge and hope this wave of zombies suddenly with time just, goes away.
It pays to be prepared for any situation, including a zombie apocalypse. There are many different kinds of zombies that have been theorized to might exist in such an event, so it’s a good idea to consider more than one possible safe location to live. Here are five more places that might be ideal to hide in during a zombie apocalypse.
There are countless TV shows and movies from ‘The Walking Dead’ to ‘Zombieland’ that can help us come up with the safest location.
The obvious places to go
I know what you are thinking, what would be better than coming across an ex Navy Seal team member who just so happens to have a basement with years of supplies and an arsenal fit for a small army.
Or perhaps, be one of the chosen individuals who have been given secret access to a Government Nuclear bunker secluded in the side of a mountain.
But none of the above were hosting a summer yoga retreat when the zombie plague began. So we have to look at a few venues that might be able to help us and our fellow yoga clan to survive.
Here are 3 retreat venues I think would offer a great base for our yoga zombie fighting retreat team.
1. Finca Abogat — The Orange Grove Sanctuary
The Finca Abogat is surrounded my hills and orange groves which can be hard terrain for enemies to find. Sitting ontop of a hill gives it a great advantage and with slopping gardens offers another great defense and point of attack.
With 30 bedrooms and 75 beds a small community could survive and co live in this environment to build a future for those left in the zombie infested new world.
Negative for zombies
· High vantage point
· Panoramic view to see incoming threats.
· Orange Groves can give cover to traps.
· Many escape routes if needed.
· Three stories offer safe places on balconies and roof tops.
· Great climate to grow food and crops.
· Isolated and private away from civilization
Positive for zombies
· Rustic structure, easier to force entry.
· Panoramic surroundings offer opportunities to attack from any side.
· Isolated from potential dwellings to offer support and protection.
· 10 minutes from a potential natural water source
Retreat Venue Location
2. Castel Fragsburg— A castle in the Alps
What better place to retreat and hide during a outbreak of man eating zombies? This castle nestled in the Alps is the ideal location to wait out the outbreak or defend the human race.
Negative for zombies
· Incredible location in the Italian Alps
· High vantage point and views of the valley below.
· Hidden and secluded in a wooded forest on the edge of a cliff.
· A strong fortress extremely hard to penetrate.
· Good hunting and foraging area
· Colder climate could help in defending position.
· Only one way to attack the structure.
· Nearby streams often access to clean drinking water.
Positive for zombies
· Only one way to escape (unless you like to cliff jump).
· Brutally cold weather in winter months could cause problems for scavenging and surviving the cold.
· Isolated so no community help nearby
3. Atlas Kasbah — The Moroccan Fortress
I think whoever built this retreat venue had in mind the potential end of the world scenario and wanted to be a step ahead of the slow moving neck biters. Atlas Kasbah seems to have everything you need. Isolated, gated and the structure itself is pretty much impenetrable unless a strain of the zombie mutates into intelligent spider climbing blood suckers.
Negative for zombies
· Incredible structure with high walls and castle towers offering opportunities to attack zombies below.
· Offers enough space to sleep a large community and protect different sides of the structure.
· In the middle of nowhere so could be hard to find for zombies roaming populated areas
· Low lands offers a chance to prepare for any incoming ‘bogies’
· No low windows and large strong doors hard to penetrate.
· Gated and fenced with reinforced steel.
Positives for zombies
· Miles from the coast
· Closest running river is 5 miles away.
· Only one gate entrance so could limit escape opportunities.
4. Sensi Azores Nature & Spa— Island Escape
Being stuck at this venue in the Azores might mean the zombies don’t even reach you. A chance to live in peace while the rest of the world burns to the ground. However, if zombies to manage to get access to the island this would be the place to set your camp.
Negative for zombies
· Located on an Island (could mean no threats).
· Close to coast.
· River nearby for clean drinking water.
· Several different buildings can offer several points of defense.
· High walled property.
· Large pool can be used as a defense from one side of the property.
· Trees located in the garden that can be used for fruits and points of attack.
· Warm climate.
Positive for zombies
· Low windows.
· Several different properties could make it easier to attack and isolate one property at a time.
So the next time you are booking your next retreat take into consideration your chance of survival at your retreat venue.
You never know. Happy retreating.
By D.J Anderson
